Resolutions

Hello, 2019. Sure, I might be a little late to the game as we’re already in March–wtf–but it just feels like the right time to say “hey” to the new year.

Usually, I’m all about the new year’s buzz. I really thought that I’d be extra motivated at the beginning of 2019 because of a radical life shift from student to full-fledged adult, a sunny vacay in Miami, and seemingly endless amounts of free time. TBH, I’m a little disappointed that I’m not feeling amped. Like how?! I’ve been dreaming of this for years!

Part of me imagined feeling more accomplished after graduating from college. I worked my a** off to make it happen: sacrificing holidays with my family, turning down nights out with friends, working two (sometimes three) jobs at a time to afford it, spending hours commuting every day. I romanticized graduation. I dreamed of the diploma that now sits in a manila envelope stuffed between GRE prep books and to-do lists.

The truth is that I don’t feel accomplished. Life isn’t better just because I have the diploma.

What really made me feel accomplished was working toward a goal. The anticipation of reaching the finish line, of putting in the time, and getting sh*t done. It was never about the ceremony, the diploma, or the infinite leisure time (until I find a job–anyone hiring?). It was always about the feeling of doing something that matters and working toward a goal.

So after this realization, I’m ready to welcome 2019. I’m ready to accept the new challenges that come my way. But this time, I will focus on enjoying the process instead of getting to the finish line.

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